Author: Louisa

Whichever way you give birth it’s never going to be without challenges. You may get to miss the pain of labour, and skip the contractions, but having a caesarean section is no easy way out. Recovery is generally longer, compared to a natural birth and once the anesthesia wears off the pain is intense. 

A determined mindset helps

In the hospital, about 6 hours after giving birth, the catheter is removed and you are asked to get up and walk. It feels like absolute agony. I made myself do it despite thinking ‘Are you kidding me? You are asking me to walk after just cutting my stomach open!’ 

It’s really hard as with any other major surgery of this type you’d be resting and sleeping for the first week or so. As most of us know, there’s no resting and little sleeping with a newborn baby. Especially those first few nights in hospital.

Give me a physical challenge   

I was told I needed to do three wees and pass wind before being discharged. There’s nothing like giving me a physical challenge so I went for it!

How hard could it be? For someone used to pushing my body to its limits it was hard. It was absolute agony getting up to walk to the toilet in the hospital. I think it took me about 10 mins to shuffle 20 metres the first time I tried. 

I did it and was really proud of myself getting out after just one night in hospital.

A strong upper body

It also helped having a strong upper body. Lots of pulling and pushing yourself up is required. The abdominal muscles are out of action for a while so it’s important to be really careful. I was really glad I’d kept up the strength workouts throughout pregnancy.  

Get help – lots of it 

The first few weeks were tough as I had to rely on Steve to do most things for me. He was brilliant. A c-section is major surgery and it hurts to do most every day things. There are things no one tells you about like incredibly painful bowl movements. A lot of women are also battling with breastfeeding in these early weeks which can cause additional pain. I felt as though the pain was moving in waves up and down my body in those first few weeks.

You can’t lift anything heavier than your baby for at least 6 weeks. This is a challenge when living in a first floor flat. Steve had to carry the pram up and down the stairs every time I went out. I felt eternally grateful he was working from home. One small silver lining of having a baby in Covid-19 lockdown. I’m not sure how women manage when their partners are back at work.

Devise some small helps around the house

I found it really helpful to use a coat hanger to pick up things from the floor. It’s really difficult to bend down in the early days. 

I also found it useful to have a paper bag (a gift bag works) which I put all my things in that I needed for the day. This meant I always had my pain killers, headphones, and anything I needed for breastfeeding with me. It was really useful knowing everything was in one place. I am definitely not used to having to ask people to do things for me and I didn’t partcularly enjoy bossing people (mostly Steve) around so the bag of essentials really helped!

Keeping a litre bottle of water next to me and some snacks was also essential. In the early days you are stuck feeding your baby for a long periods of time and it’s really hard to get up without any help.

Take small steps

After the first week I managed to very slowly shuffle to the end of the street and back. In 10 days I made it to the local greasy spoon and back but it was painful. The eggs and sausages definitely helped!

After about 2 weeks I was able to do one lap of my local park. I slowly built it up from there to be able to do a 25-minute walk. 4 weeks in I was able to do some strenuous hill walks. I pushed the pram up roads near my house on hills and did circuits to try and improve my fitness.

You can easily end up walking for miles and miles everyday with a newborn. Walking is a great way to build up fitness pretty quickly and feel your best self at the same time. It’s also a perfect way to connect with friends and family on the phone and listen to music and/or podcasts.

At 12 weeks I started following an adapted couch to 5K programme as recommended by my physio (see below for more details). At month 5 I was delighted to run 5K in under 25 minutes. I’m now setting my sights on a 10K.

Take a break

This is the one time in our lives where we’re allowed to have a rest as much as we can with a newborn baby. I made sure I took it easy properly for the first couple of weeks allowing my body to recover. I knew listening to my body and resting after my c-section would allow me to get back to do the activities that I love sooner rather than later.

This required a persistent mindset and , being in tune with my body and being really kind to myself. Practicing self-compassion really helped as well as continuing with my meditation where I was able to (see previous posts on self-compassion and staying well with a newborn baby).

See a physiotherapist

One of the best things as I did after having a baby was to make an appointment to see a women’s health specialist physiotherapist. In my experience the post natal GP sign off at 6-8 weeks is not thorough enough. I would highly recommend seeing a physio to make sure you are ok to return to normal activities.

I went to see women’s health specialist Zoe Eggleton. It was great. She did a full Mum MOT on me. This involved checking my abdominals for diastasis recti (separation of the abs) and a full asessment of my pelvic floor. She taught me how to massage my c-section scar to reduce the scar tissue. As a specialist post-natal personal trainer I am trained to check for diastasis recti myself but it was absolutely invaluable to be checked properly by an expert.

She also gave me a program to return to running. This consisted of a series of specialist exercises to build strength in the muscles I’d need for running as well as my core. She encouraged me to start to follow the couch to 5k programme as a way to ensure my pelvic floor muscles and core were strong enough to cope with the demands of running.

Seeing a physio might seem extravagent but it’s the best money you’ll ever spend on yourself to get your body back into shape. Some women struggle with pelvic floor weakness years after giving birth. No one wants to worry about leaking wee everytime they sneeze!

BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT YOUR BODY CAN ACHIEVE

I’m so proud of what my body can achieve. It’s amazing and such a miracle it managed to produce a baby in the first place. And then bounce back with such resilience and strength. It has really giving me an entirely new sense of respect for what our bodies can do. I am also really proud of myself for managing to keep exercising whilst I care for my baby. I want her to grow up loving movement as much as we do and have a childhood full of activity!

The challenges

Having a new baby is one of the most amazing, as well as one of the hardest things many people will ever be lucky enough to experience. I am treasuring every precious moment especially as I never thought I’d have this. Every day is a learning curve and it is hard. There are lots of things people don’t tell you about like how hard breastfeeding is and how much it hurts.

It has been especially challenging having a baby in the midst of lockdown and not being able to have the usual visitors/help, go to in-person classes or be able to be inside other than our own homes during the winter. Alex from my Happy Parents Happy Baby antenatal group said “it’s been tough being stuck near our flats in the winter. It’s impossible to change nappies and feed babies in freezing temperatures when all the cafes and coffee shops are closed – previously a new Mum’s saviour”.

ups and downs

It’s easy for our mood to go from sky high elation to doom and gloom in a matter of moments. There are instances of absolute pure and adoring joy and then the next thinking what on earth has happened to my life? Despite wanting this more than ever and having such a long and hard journey to get here it is definitely not easy. 

As an advocate of wellbeing I am determined to take on this biggest challenge of my life and still feel my best self. I am determined to treat myself and my family with kindness and nurture myself. 

So here are my top ways of keeping myself healthy in body and mind in the first 4 months of having my new baby:

1. Prioritise self-care:

Obviously our tiny new person comes first and dictates our lives entirely. However, I figure that if I don’t look after myself I can’t be the best version of myself for her. So I try to do at least one act of self-care each day, even if that means just having a 3 min shower (which is the most amazing thing at the moment).

2. Staying completely rooted in the present moment:

Knowing that the current emotion, mood, thought or situation won’t last is so helpful. It’s so easy to feel absolutely overwhelmed with the huge change in lifestyle, not to mention suddenly being responsible for a tiny little human. It’s also hard to sift through the trillions of bits of advice, info and tips you are meant to know/take on board so staying rooted in the present helps to prevent feeling overwhelmed.  

In the early days it was really helpful to say to myself that I wouldn’t feel like this forever. The fog and the hormone cloud definitely clears after 8-12 weeks and I started to feel much more like my old self again.

3. Meditate whilst feeding:

It’s hard to find my usual 10 minutes a day to meditate quietly on my own. So I do one meditation a day whilst feeding when she is calm and still (not always possible!). It’s amazing to close my eyes and really focus on my breath whilst my baby feeds and stay absolutely focused on the sensations and our bodies breathing together. It’s also really useful to meditate when I am trying to get back to sleep in the middle of the night after a feed. See my previous post on the power of meditation here.

4. Deep breathing:

It’s important to practise deep breathing to get the core abdominal muscles back into shape after pregnancy. Especially to help remove the classic c-section bulge no one tells you you get!

I apply the tiny habits method (see my previous blog post) to attach this habit to existing daily routines. I do deep abdominal breathing twice a day during a shower and just before I go to sleep (which also serves to slow down my nervous system ready for bed). There are some great videos on how to do this properly out there. See this video by BodyFit by Amy here. A good one for healing diastasis recti (separation of the abdominals after pregnancy) is here from Pregnancy and Postpartum TV.

5. Exercise:

It’s hard when so stretched for time but there are so many ways to fit exercise in to your life as a new parent. Exercise is so important to feel our best selves as well as to help shift the baby weight and get back into pre-pregnancy shape.

Thinking about exercising throughout the day rather than in one chunk is helpful. For example, doing press-ups over my baby as she plays on my yoga mat so I can give her eye contact.

Walking is such a joy after having a baby especially as a way of getting back in to exercise slowly. It was my way of healing myself and getting stronger after my c-section. Alex said “walking is a brilliant way to be mindful. It also allowed me to catch up with family remotely on the phone whilst the baby sleeps – a win win!”

I’ll write a new post about this in more detail soon. See my previous post on how to fit exercise throughout your day here.  

6. Eating and drinking well:

It’s so important to treat ourselves kindly and eat nutritious and healthy food at all times but especially when sleep deprived and exhausted. I try to always make sure I eat a mostly plant based diet with enough protein and choose wholegrain where possible. Treats are also essential so I am enjoying chocolate and the odd beer or glass of wine!

Staying hydrated is particularly important with a newborn, especially if you are breastfeeding. I keep a 1 litre bottle of water with me at all times. Often I am feeding and not able to move so it’s really important to always be drinking water.  

7. Practising self-compassion

Practising self compassion as a new parent is a really important tool and one which research has shown will benefit both parents and their kids. It’s essential to embrace the 3 core principles of self-compassion:

• treat ourselves with kindness
• stay rooted in the present moment
• be aware that we are going through this experience with so many others who are likely to have had, or be having, similar struggles.

See my previous blog post on self-compassion here. Simply acknowledging that the moment is hard and telling myself I am doing OK helps a lot. There are some great resources on self-compassion on Kristin Neff’s website here. There’s also some specific guidance on self-compassion for parents here.

8. Ask for help and stay connected:

It’s hard and it’s OK to ask for help. It’s been so difficult learning to parent in lockdown without the support we would normally have had. We’ve had to adapt and take help where we can.  I had some really amazing help with breastfeeding throughout the first 3 months from the wonderful HENRY Team. Without reaching out to them it would have been so much tougher. The La Leche League also provides a very useful source of support for new parents including counsellors and a support group.

Connecting with other new parents is also really helpful to feel less isolated and share the worries and concerns we all naturally feel as new parents. My Happy Parents Happy Baby group is invaluable as a support network.

9. Don’t put too much pressure on myself:

It’s easier to accept that the to do list will never get completed and it’s OK to not get stuff done as I used to pre-baby. It takes so much longer to do anything with a newborn baby so expectations need to be adjusted for what we can achieve in any given moment. I try to appreciate the small wins. Like managing to do 5 minutes of yoga when she’s happily lying on the mat. Or making soup with her sitting in the bouncy chair and me using one leg to bounce her up. But I also try not to worry if plans go out of the window in the next moment. 

It’s also been really important not to compare myself, or my baby, with others. We are all different, as are our babies, and we all do things in our own ways. New parents can feel a lot of pressure to conform to a certain way of doing things. I found listening to my own intuition more important than trying to do what others do/tell us to do.

10. Sleep sleep sleep!

Obviously sleep is disrupted with a newborn and I knew I’d be tired. I always thought I’d feel permanently like I do when I get home from 5 days at Glastonbury, i.e. dead to the world and walking around in a zombified state with a never-ending hangover! But thankfully it doesn’t seem to be as bad as that.

Somehow I seem to have adjusted to thinking a 4 hour stretch of sleep is equivalent to a full night. I now only seem to have a midweek gig hangover, equivalent to a few too many cans of red stripes of permanent state of tiredness. So this feels like a win.

In the early days I took naps wherever I could and now it’s going to bed at 9pm other than Fridays where I let myself stay up. Otherwise life is just a bit too dull! Telling ourselves this won’t last forever also helps.

This is my last post for a while. I’m having my baby any day and I’m spending a bit of time relaxing and chilling out before I do so I officially stopped working on December 4th.

What a strange year it’s been! Full of ups and downs and surprises, heart ache, pain, grief and loss. It’s also been a year where we’ve slowed down, reflected and appreciated the important things in life. As we are now seeing the light at the end of the tunnel with the vaccine on the horizon it does feel as though 2021 will be a more positive year for many of us. 

It’s been a challenging year for me as I’ve worked to get my new business off the ground under very difficult circumstances. I’ve gained a huge amount but also found it very difficult at times. See my previous post on what we’ve gained in 2020 here. 

In amongst it all I’ve experienced a miraculous pregnancy, which I never thought would ever happen, and we are now preparing for the arrival of our little baby. This is my last blog post for a while as I take some time off for maternity leave but I’ll be back sometime in 2021 with more learnings on how to feel your best self. 

Staying active in pregnancy

As my final piece for 2020 I thought I’d reflect on how staying active in pregnancy is so important. It’s also helped me so much with my physical and mental health. I’ve been studying for my pre and post-natal exercise and nutrition specialism qualification and have therefore learnt a great deal about why exercise and nutrition is vital during pregnancy and in the post-natal period. 

It’s completely safe and advisable to stay active in pregnancy

There are lots of myths surrounding exercise and pregnancy with many still believing that women should put their feet up and rest for the entire 9 months. 

What’s best for you and your baby is actually the opposite. Unless you are experiencing any complications with your pregnancy then it is absolutely safe and advisable to continue to exercise throughout pregnancy. Particularly if you were active pre-pregnancy. For women who didn’t do any regular exercise before becoming pregnant it is still safe to start moving now if precautions are followed. 

Benefits to staying active during pregnancy

There are so many benefits to staying active during pregnancy including: 

• Helping to reduce maternal weight gain 
• Maintaining general fitness
• Reducing the risk of high blood pressure 
• Improving sleep and mood
• Improving posture and reducing back pain
• Easing of constipation 
• Reducing the risk of gestational diabetes, preeclampsia and the need to have a caesarean section 
• Helping to maintain and increase body awareness and improved self-image.

In her book Roar: how to match your food and fitness to your female physiology for optimum performance, great health, and a strong, lean body for life Dr Stacey T. Sims includes a chapter on exercise and pregnancy. She talks about how exercise is good for the pregnant mother and baby on so many levels. She even refers to a study showing how keeping active in pregnancy actually improved fitness levels and performance significantly post-natally.

Guidelines state that pregnant women should aim for 150 minutes of moderate intensity activity a week.  

Exercise is good for the growing fetus

Sims notes that exercise is good for the baby in terms of: 

• Reducing future risk of developing cardiovascular disease
• Improving metabolism later in the life: the child is less likely to suffer from childhood obestity and develop diabetes
• Being more likely to lead to a healthier birth weight. 

She says

“Exercising in early pregnancy has a profoundly positive effect on your developing baby, as it stimulates placenta growth and function as well as the organs and systems of the baby. Staying active through the later stages of pregnancy keeps your baby’s growth and development on track. All this good stuff happens with just 30 to 45 minutes of exercise a day.” 

Stacey T. Sims Roar: how to match your food and fitness to your female physiology for optimum performance, great health, and a strong, lean body for life

Exercise is essential in the post-natal phase

Exercise in the post natal period (once signed off from the doctor) also has lots of benefits including: 

• Aiding faster post-natal recovery 
• Helping to reduce the risk of developing post-natal depression 
• Aids the return to pre-pregnancy weight
• Relieves stress 
• Improves sleep and energy levels
• Strengthens and builds muscles. Particularly the abdominals (the  rectus abdominis) which are weakened during pregnancy
• Helps build bone growth important if women are breastfeeding
• Provides functional fitness for a new life as a parent 

Adaptations needed in pregnancy 

Adaptations will need to be made for each trimester and it’s advisable for pre and post-natal women to work with a specialist personal trainer to start with to ensure adaptations are correct and safe.

In fact, most exercises are actually safe to continue throughout pregnancy as long as you feel comfortable. The main adaptations needed are:  

• Working out at a moderate intensity and avoiding interval training or HIIT sessions which may lead to overheating or breathlessness 
• Avoiding lying on the back in the supine position, and on the front in the prone position, in the second and third trimesters
• Being careful to avoid exercises which put strain on the abdominal muscles (the  rectus abdominis) such as crunches, planks and press ups. However it is important to continue to work other parts of the deep core (for example, transversus abdominus and the obliques) 
• Pelvic floor exercises are very important during the pre and post-natal phases and should be incorporated into any training programme
• Avoiding high impact workouts in second and third trimesters 
• Staying away from contact sports or activities where there could be a risk of falling 
• Adapting stretches so they are less intense than usual 
• Being aware of exercises which require balance

There are lots of other things to think about here which is why working with a specialist trainer during pregnancy is always a good idea (I’m soon to be qualified!).

Pregnancy is not a time to increase fitness levels or attempt any personal challenges. It’s all about staying active and maintaining fitness levels where possible. 

I had to make adjustments to my own training 

People who know me know I’m always running, swimming, cycling, doing yoga and pushing my body in my training sessions. I’m usually training for some sort of endurance event.

When I found out I was pregnant I had to really adapt my thinking around my training and make sure I was really listening to my body and taking the pace down considerably. I’ve managed to keep active throughout the entire pregnancy but I had to stop running at around 18 weeks as it didn’t feel comfortable anymore. 

Swimming on the other hand, has been possible throughout and I kept it up as much as I could around the swimming pool closures in lockdown. There’s nothing nicer than floating in the water when you have a heavy bump to carry. I couldn’t do breaststroke as I suffered pelvic pain but front crawl has been fine and I was still able to do over 50 lengths after 38 weeks which I was very happy about.

Pre natal yoga has also been amazing and I’ve been doing classes at my local studio East of Eden and through a trainer based in York. I’ve also been following some specialist online yoga and found some strength workouts suitable in pregnancy which have been really great. 

My plans for 2021

Who knows what 2021 holds for us all! It’s all a big uncertain adventure at the moment. What i’m hoping is that i’ll be able to get my fitness classes back up and running sometime in March/April and also add in some specialist pre and post natal sessions. I will keep you all posted and encourage you to sign up to my emails so you get the latest updates on when I’m back. 

Until then I’ll sign off and say goodbye for now! 

Louisa xx

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There’s some really good evidence to show that eating mindfully can assist with improved dietary behaviour as well as be a successful mechanism for weight loss. It is also an effective and free way to develop a healthier, happier and more positive relationship with food. It can assist towards weight loss by encouraging healthier food choices and discourage overeating. 

What is mindful eating? 

Essentially mindful eating is paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, to what we are eating and our overall eating experience. It’s mindfulness but in relation to food! See my earlier post for more on general mindfulness principles here. 

How often do you actually sit down and really give your full attention to the sensations and tastes in your mouth as you eat? We are usually too busy and end up eating on the go, in front of the TV or our desks as we do something else. 

In their book What to Eat When: A Strategic Plan to Improve Your Health and Life

Michael Roizen, Michael Crupain and Ted Spiker talk about how we have lost touch with food as a sensory experience. We tend to shovel food down without taking the time to really appreciate and savour it. It means we are probably overeating without really realising. We are also missing out on the joy food brings. Think about how many people continue working whilst mindlessly eating their lunch without even properly registering what they are doing. I am sure we’ve all done this. 

The science of mindful eating for successful weight loss

Roizen, Crupaina and Spiker refer to a 2018 analysis in the Journal of the International Association for the Study of Obesity. This study assessed 19 other studies on mindful eating and concluded that it successfully produced effective weight loss and improved dietary behaviour. Other studies have shown that participants who ate mindfully lost more weight than those who ate normally. A literature review published in 2018 in the journal Nutritional Research Reviews, which assessed 68 studies on weight loss interventions, found that “Mindfulness-based approaches appear most effective in addressing binge eating, emotional eating and eating in response to external cues” and “Encouraging a mindful eating approach would seem to be a positive message to be included in general weight management advice to the public.”

Studies have also shown that mindful eating can also aid digestion and help encourage a healthy gut. 

Why does mindful eating work? 

There are several reasons: 

• By specifically focusing on each bite it naturally encourages slower eating. This helps avoid weight gain as it gives the body time to register whether it is actually full or not. The hormone leptin is released which signals to the brain that the body is full but this usually takes up to 20 minutes. It’s not surprising that eating slowly aids this. As Brian Wansink notes in Mindless Eating: Why we eat more than we think, a lot of extra cookies or portions of ice cream can be consumed in 20 minutes. 
• Eating more slowly encourages us to eat smaller portions as we are more likely to avoid second helpings as we have already registered feeling full.
• It also makes it less likely we’ll be craving sweet food after our main dish as we will be more satisfied and fuller. 
• By focusing on the food we are eating it more likely encourages healthier choices as we become more conscious of what we are putting in our bodies. Eating becomes an act of self-care. By starting to eat mindfully you are more likely to begin to retrain your brain to be much more in tune with your food choices. You may opt for a balanced meal based on fresh, wholegrain food ensuring you are getting the right amount of protein to nourish your body. 
• It also encourages us to have a more ethical outlook to food and to really think about where the food has come from and how it is connected to the world.  
• In Mindless Eating Brian Wansink discusses how we rely on social cues to tell us to stop eating rather than listening to our bodies. Finishing what’s on our plates may be drummed into as from an early age so starting with a smaller plate may be a good idea. When you are eating with a group of friends how often do you keep eating until the last person has finished? 

“When practiced to its fullest, mindful eating turns a simple meal into a spiritual experience, giving us a deep appreciation of all that went into the meal’s creation as well a deep understanding of the relationship between the food on our table, our own health, and our planet’s health”.

Thich Nhat Hanh Savor: Mindful Eating, Mindful Life

How to try mindful eating? 

Here are eight simple ways you can try to embrace mindful eating in your every day life: 

1. Plan your food ahead of time

Spend time looking for recipes and bring in mindfulness techniques when you are shopping for your food and preparing it. Take time to notice how you are preparing the food – carefully paying attention to each chop of the knife and how the food feels in your hands. 

2. Start with a smaller plate…

3. Put your fork or spoon down between each bite

This will encourage slowing down and enable your body to properly digest the food. 

4. Eat your meals without distraction

Sit at a table without the TV on or your phone and see what difference that makes. If you focus your full attention on the food you are eating you will find that you naturally develop gratitude towards the food on your plate.  You will appreciate the amazing textures, smells and feelings food evokes in each mouthful. 

5. Really listen to your body

Before you eat concentrate on how you really feel. Are you genuinely hungry? Once you have eaten then concentrate on how it feels. Do you really need that second helping or snack a few hours after?

6. Reflect on your thoughts

Before your meal think about how you feel so you can start to recognise your emotions and what might be driving you to eat when you might not be hungry. We all do this and it is completely normal. It’s good practice to start recognising this so you can learn how your body and mind are interacting. After your meal try not to rush to get up and do the dishes or move on to your next chore really savour the feelings the food has evoked.

7. Chew your food for longer than you normally do

We often do not chew our food properly which can result in damaging consequences for our jaws. It’s also a lot better for the digestive system to chew food properly. 

8. Try the eating a raisin mindfulness exercise

If your mind starts to wander this is completely normal. You simply bring yourself back to the exercise. There’s a script on this website here which is useful for this exercise. 

Note, if you are suffering from an eating disorder mindful eating may not be appropriate for you. Please seek advice from a health professional. 

As we get into this second national lockdown in England it’s more important than ever to keep moving. Physical activity and exercise helps strengthen our physical and mental health in so many ways. Including reducing the risk of developing cardiovascular disease and certain forms of cancer to boosting our mood, self-esteem, creativity and self-perception. It is also a very effective tool in tackling anxiety and reducing the chances of developing depression. 

Exercise helps fight respiratory diseases like Covid-19

But did you know that exercise can also help protect against Covid-19 and other respiratory diseases? There is a growing body of evidence to suggest that physical activity and exercise strengthens the immune system. This is especially important at the moment as we fight the Covid-19 pandemic. 

In his recent podcast titled “the surprising truth about exercise” with Dr Rangan Chatterjee,  Professor of Human Evolutionary Biology Daniel Lieberman, discusses this very topic. He notes that being physically fit and active regulates key components of the immune system to produce more cells which attack viruses in the body. Not only are more of these “killer cells” produced but the body can deploy them to areas of the body which need them to attack viruses. People who are more physically active and fit therefore have more antibodies and a healthier response to vaccines. Professor Lieberman has said that one of the most effective ways of protecting yourself against Covid-19 is to exercise regularly. 

So how can we keep moving? 

It’s naturally harder to motivate ourselves to workout when it’s cold and dark outside. It’s particularly tough as gyms, swimming pools and other fitness facilities are are closed for the time being. There are however lots of other forms of physical activity that are still available to us during this time. 

Here are some ideas: 

1. Get an exercise buddy:

Thankfully the rules allow meeting one other person outside which means you can get yourself an exercise buddy. Find someone local who you know and arrange to go for a walk or a run with them at a regular time each week. You don’t have to do loads, in fact, it’s always advisable to start small and build up to more as you go. 

There’s clear evidence to show that exercising with another person helps to sustain motivation and commitment. Working out with another person is also sociable and therefore likely to be more fun. You are less likely to bail out of your session if you have made a firm and regular commitment to go with the other person. They will also gain from having your encouragement and motivation and you can keep each other going if you get stuck. 

2. Dance around your living room

Put your favourite songs on and have a 10 minute boogey around your living room! This is a great thing you can do with kids and other family members to have some fun. You can also burn lots of calories by doing this whilst getting your heart rate up. I am sure you’ll find it will also enhance your mood.

As expert Kelly McGonigal talks about in her book The Joy of Movement, music energises and empowers and connects us to others.  Why not try this at the end of a long day sat at your computer (if you are working from home at the moment)? 

3. Get out for a daily walk

Pick a time each day and get out for a walk. Even if it’s just for 10 minutes. A good time is first thing in the morning or after lunch. 

You’ll get the benefits of being outside combined with being physically active and it’s pretty much guaranteed to make you feel better.

4. Try some online workouts

There are hundreds of great online workouts, classes and YouTube exercise videos to try and most of them don’t require any specialist equipment. Some of my favourites are: 

• Kitchen Dancing – fun dance/fitness classes to 80s, 90s and noughties music, in a disco setting, from the comfort of your own home.
• The Fitness Marshall: a fun and whacky fitness solution with Caleb Marshall taking you through dance routines to pop hits. 
• Personal Trainer Dave Weston does an 11am boxercise workout every Saturday morning for free! Follow him on Instagram for details.
• Yoga: Great for the body and the mind: There are lots of online yoga tutors including Yoga with Adriene and most yoga studios are doing streamed classes. 
• The Body Coach TV: Joe Wicks The Body Coach has over 250 free workouts and he’s also doing regular live streams of his workouts 
• Our Parks as fitness in the Parks isn’t available at the moment the Our Parks initiative have lots of free virtual classes to try!

5. Build exercise around your day

In one of my recent blogposts I talked about how succesful behaviour change starts small by anchoring to existing habits. Here are some ideas to build small habits which if successful are likely to grow: 

• Do two squats every time you boil the kettle 
• Tricep dip on your bath every time you go to the toilet 
• After you brush your teeth do 2 press ups 
• Do 5 pelvic floor exercises every time you are sitting in a virtual meeting/zoom call 
• When you turn the shower on do two lunges as you are waiting for the water to heat up
• After you get out of bed in the morning do two minutes of meditation or breathing exercises

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Diet is a vastly contested subject and it’s a multi million dollar industry worldwide. In the UK alone the diet industry is valued at around £2 billion. According to the latest NHS stats, the majority of adults in the UK are overweight or obese: 67% of men and 60% of women. It is estimated that as many as 1 in 3 people in the UK are on a diet most of the time. In women this could be as many as 67%. 

The diets

There are hundreds of diets out there from the carb free Atkins, to time restricted eating diets like the 5:2. The NHS has a useful review of the pros and cons of some of the more sensible diets here.

In truth, as pessimistic as it sounds, most diets don’t give us the results many of us are looking for. They are not leading to long term sustainable weight loss. Sadly it is predicted that up to 95% of people, who lose weight through dieting, will go on to regain it within 1 to 5 years. A good proportion will go on to gain even more weight.  

Bias in the science

Professor John P.A. Ioannidis talks about how there is bias in almost all scientific research on diet and nutrition. He has studied the literature in the area of nutrition and diet and concluded that the evidence pointing to most theories on diet and nutrition is extremely unreliable. It is subject to the biases of funders, scientists, sponsors and reviewers and there’s far too many variables at stake. It is therefore really difficult to point at firm conclusions as to which diets work and which ones don’t on a wide population level.

5 reasons why dieting doesn’t work in the long term: 

1. Willpower…

is a finite resource. It can be depleted in one situation and then is not available for the next. So relying on willpower alone when dieting won’t work. 

Will you have enough willpower left to resist eating one as a reward for your workout? Probably not, and that’s not your fault, it’s the way our brains are designed. 

Behavioural scientist Kelly McGonigal, in her book The Willpower Instinct, talks about willpower being like a physical muscle. You can exhaust your willpower muscle but you can also exercise it to get stronger. We have daily willpower reserves that get used up which is why we are much more likely to resort to eating unhealthy, high fat and sugary food after a long hard day at work. 

Failing at dieting is not about being weak willed or lazy, it’s an absolutely normal part of being a human being.

Kelly talks about ways you can train your willpower muscle. For example, purposefully placing a chocolate bar on the desk where you work and resisting the temptation to eat it for 20 minutes. Then once the 20 minutes is up take one small square and eat it and then put the chocolate bar away out of sight. I’ll talk about this in a later blogpost as it’s such a fascinating topic. 

Interestingly, willpower has shown to be much more effective when making decisions about eating healthy food rather than about depriving ourselves of certain food groups. 

2. Focusing on the short-term:

Most diets require drastic change far too quickly. Indeed, people will lose weight on diets in the short term, if they stick to them, but long term it is much harder. We see this miraculous weight loss results in celebrities and we all crave a piece of the action. 

However, for the vast majority of people these diets do not work sustainably as they rely on the individual continuing to put the effort in. This leads back to the problems discussed in point one above on willpower. Most people will end up putting the weight back on over time as they return to more “normal” eating habits. Hence the term yo yo dieting. 

Neuroscientist Sandra Aamodt in her TED talk “why dieting doesn’t usually work” refers to Dr Rudy Leibel’s work at Columbia University. He has found that people who have lost 10% of their body weight burn 250-400 fewer calories as a result of their suppressed metabolism. Meaning that to succeed as a dieter and keep the weight loss off you must continue to eat this much less food forever than someone of the same weight. 

3. We have not evolved to diet:

We can’t underestimate our evolutionary history here: our bodies were built to cling on to all available calories as food was scarce back in the hunter gatherer days. Our ancestors would look for high density calorie rich foods with as little effort as possible as they didn’t know when the next meal would come along. If the body is deprived of food it will naturally respond by slowing the metabolism and then making it harder to lose weight. This can result in unhealthy and potentially dangerous binge starve cycles. Our modern world doesn’t work so well in this context where any type of food is available 24 hours a day at the click of a button with minimum effort. 

This is why putting on weight is a lot easier than losing it. In his book Why We Get Fat And What To Do About it, Gary Taubes discusses how our modern diet is a relatively recent phenomenon and our bodies have not had time to evolve in response. We only began eating flour and “carbohydrates”, as we know them, 12,000 years ago and yet human beings have been on the planet for millions of years. We therefore haven’t genetically been able to cope as well with the relatively recent modern phenomenon of high carb, high sugar foods. Gary Taubes research is clear that if you want to lose weight sustainably then one of the best tactics is to limit carbohydrate consumption especially the highly processed types such as white flour, pasta, bread, crisps, sugar etc. This needs to be taken in context however, if you are training and exercising a lot your body does need carbohydrates.  

4. Our brain and the reward system:

Sandra Aamodt in her book Why Diets Make us Fat: the unintended consequences of our obsession with weight loss talks about how the brain has a crucial role here. The reward system in our brain is triggered when we eat tasty food. 

Our bodies have a finely turned energy balance system which keeps weight at a defined range based on a multitude of factors. It’s relatively easy for our bodies to go up and down within this range but very difficult to increase or decrease outside of this range (Sandra says it’s usually 12-15 pounds). This is controlled by the brain and she compares it to a thermostat. If you try to lose weight your brain responds by thinking the body is starving.

If this balance is disrupted research has shown that actually diets can cause more changes in the brain making this reward response even stronger and resulting in further cravings for sweet sugary food. That’s another reason why we are programmed to find weight gain much easier than weight loss. 

Have you ever tried the psychology experiment where you are told not to think about something – i.e. a white rabbit? Our brains automatically think of the thing we are told not to think of. It’s the same with depriving yourself of a food group or type of food. If you tell yourself you are not allowed any cake you might be able to stick to this in the short term. Eventually (assuming you are a cake fan) you’ll not be able to resist the temptation to eat the cake and the chances are you’ll have more than one small slice. 

5. We are all different and genetics play a huge role:

Another reason so many diets just don’t work is that we are all different. Our genetics, our physiology, our sleeping patterns, hormone balances, lifestyle, support networks, financial situations, behaviour patterns, cravings, digestion, work life, family life, mindset, attitude towards exercise and nutrition – the list goes on! 

So what may work for your best mate, in terms of losing weight, may not work for you and vice versa. 

Genetics play a huge component here. I know lots of people become increasingly frustrated when they try their hardest to stick to a diet and their partners end up eating whatever they like and losing more weight than them. Unfortunately some people are prone to put weight on more than others as a result of their genetic make-up. 

So what is the answer to successful weight loss? 

So what can you do if you want to lose weight sustainably and for the long term? No one wants to hear it but it’s going to take hard work, time, lots of self-reflection and learning, dedication, a few failures and reassessing the complex physiological, psychological and biochemical processes at play. 

In essence, there isn’t really one clear solution to fit all but there are healthy ways to approach the issue including: 

• Focusing on eating nutritious and wholegrain foods rather than depriving ourselves of food groups: swapping white pasta, rice and bread for wholegrain is a good place to start. 
• Allowing sufficient breaks between eating to enable insulin levels to drop (4-5 hours between meals and 12 hours overnight). See my previous post on this topic here. 
• Focusing on portion control and size of meals and waiting 10 minutes after you finish your first portion before eating more
• Cutting down on alcohol – there are lots of hidden calories in alcohol and it’s surprising how drinking can chip into the daily calorie allowance.
• Getting better quality sleep (see my earlier post on sleep here for details)
• Learning how to eat mindfully and intuitively and really listening to your body
• Changing focus and learning to accept the body you are in whatever the size or shape
• And of course getting lots of exercise and physical activity in! 

I’m building my coaching programme to help people work through the steps in finding a long term solution which works for them in terms of exercise, weight loss and nutrition. If you’d like some help in this area please do contact me as I’ve got coaching spaces available. 

My work has been directly affected as Derek Draper, a colleague, friend and my main source of work since I started my own business, was taken into hospital with extreme coronavirus in March and he is still in an semi-unconscious state. You may have read about him in the news as he’s one of the most seriously affected cases in the country. It’s so awful and really worrying and I think of him every day and wish him well. The future is so uncertain for so many of us but for Derek and his family it is excruciating. It has really driven home how serious this virus is for many people and how we must do our best to stick to the rules however frustrating they seem to be.

It’s been a year none of us could ever have predicted or expected. We would never have imagined that we’d be facing a global pandemic or have experienced many of the things we’ve experienced in the past 6 months. It’s far from over but here we are.

2020 so far has been full of highs, lows, sadness, grief, loss, anguish, anxiety and stress amongst other things. In amongst it all there’s been an incredible sense of growth and learning. 

I think it’s important to look at this year and reflect on what we have gained and the things we’ve learned which we would not have done had we not had the pandemic to contend with. 

Five things you’ve gained from 2020: 

So here’s your challenge…think of 5 positive things you have gained from this year. Write them down and reflect on them. No matter how small or large (I’m so conscious that so many people have struggled and there’s this sort of expectation to achieve when actually just getting through the day or even each moment is hard enough). I think you could be surprised what you might come up with. 

Here are mine: 

1. A Year of Learning:

This has been a year of learning in so many ways for me. Starting my own business during a global pandemic wasn’t what I anticipated. It’s been really challenging and pushed me outside of my comfort zone. True, I haven’t earned a lot of money but I decided I would use the time wisely to read, study, and connect with like minded people. I’ve completed Marie Forleo’s B-School – a business course aimed at people with their own online businesses. I’ve also become a qualified Mental Health First Aider after doing the two day course through Luminate. I’m also about to embark on adding a further qualification to my fitness instructor and personal trainer qualifications by doing the pre and post natal course at Level 3 to allow me to specialise in pregnancy exercise and post-natal and also help me to understand how my own body has changed. 

I’ve read lots of books on habit change, resilience, willpower and motivation to aid my learning and assist with my coaching including:

• Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes Remarkable Results
• The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
• Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy
• When things fall apart: heart advice for difficult times

• Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything
• Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

2. Adapting to change and uncertainty

I think we’ve all had to adapt to change in one way or another this year in our personal and professional lives. I’ve had to adapt to Derek’s illness and the change in circumstances for me. Which of course is a million times harder for Derek’s family but it has had serious knock on consequences for me. 

I’ve adapted to the idea of being pregnant and changed my behaviours accordingly. I am now coming to terms with the amazing and equally terrifying idea of becoming a parent. We’ve had to change the way we socialise, work, travel, connect with others and the things we do. 

Uncertainty is tough for everyone and it’s especially tough at the moment when for many of us we face health concerns, worries about jobs and finances and general angst about the state of the world. I listened to a really great podcast at the start of lockdown which I’d recommend to anyone struggling with uncertainty. Here it is: Elizabeth Day and How to Fail with Mo Gawat.

3. Slowing down and spending time in nature

I think one of the nicest things about the last 6 months has been how much more time I’ve spent in my local park and outside. The pace of life has slowed down considerably. There’s been no rushing to the train to get into work and I’m very happy to have not had to be squashed onto a packed train or London underground train especially during my pregnancy. 

Our local park has become a sanctuary – somewhere we’ve never appreciated as much. We’ve come to love each part of it and it has become more than just a park it’s a place…

4. Connecting with loved ones

Whilst we haven’t always been able to see the people we want to see in the flesh I feel this time has given us the gift of connecting more closely to our loved ones either on the phone or zoom. It’s made us appreciate how important our connections are and how much we value family and friends. 

5. Doing lots of exercise in innovative ways

I’ll often feel a bit sluggish beforehand and am always on a total high afterwards. Kelly McGonigal talks about this in her book The Joy of Movement which I wrote about in a blog post here a while ago. 

For the first 10 weeks of lockdown I also ran PE classes for kids once a week which was a great way to see the kids in my life and also get another bit of movement in. 

I challenge you to come up with your own list of 5 things and write them in the comments below!

A familiar excuse I am always hearing from people is “I don’t have time to exercise”.

In this post I’m arguing that it’s exactly the other way round. If you actually take a bit of time out of your day to do some structured exercise you will get more time back in terms of your concentration, energy, productivity, creativity and focus. You don’t have to go out for hours, it can just be a 20 min walk or a short burst of gardening or dancing around your living room for 15 minutes!

Lunchtime is a great time to exercise

For 15 years I worked in a 9-5 (ish) office job. For most of these years I’d do exercise in my lunch break at least 3 times a week. I was responsible for the running club whilst working at SAGE Publishing. Every Tuesday and Thursday a group of us would go out and run around 5K and sometimes we’d also add in some strength training too (see the picture at the end of this blog). I’d always make time in my diary to do this as it was super important to consistently do this a) for myself and b) to encourage others in the group. We’d also organise group events such as 10K runs, or charity fundraising events which helped motivate and inspire people.  

Exercising with other people has been shown to be really effective in encouraging adherence and motivation. Kelly McGonigal talks about this in her book The Joy of Movement. I covered this in my earlier blog post on the topic. It’s even better if you have a scheduled time every week you know when the session will take place. You will be more likely to go as you won’t want to let other people and your self down. A healthy dose of competition can also be motivating! 

Here are 5 reasons why exercising in the middle of the day is a great idea:

1. Exercising in the day increases productivity, focus and creativity

On the days i’d do exercise at lunch time I’d find I’d have more energy, be more focused and more able to do my job more effectively than days I hadn’t gone out or taken a lunchbreak. It  can also reduce the effects of the afternoon slump we are all prone to. 

Fran Saint-Geris, a friend who ran the running club with me, said

“I realise that I’m lucky to have a job that is flexible enough to allow me to exercise at lunch time, but I just don’t think there’s a better way to use a lunch hour. After a lunch run I’d come back into the office with a sense of accomplishment that completely outweighed the fact that I had a big red face for the next couple of hours. Whether I’d run with colleagues, and have conversations I would never normally have otherwise, or whether I’d run by myself, I always come back to an afternoon of work feeling refreshed. These afternoons never seemed to drag like they could on other days and I’d be left way more productive”.

Even getting out for a short walk at lunchtime can have enormous benefits for your productivity for the rest of the day. It’s also a great way to get away from the screen, get some fresh air and enjoy some respite. 

2. Exercising improves memory and learning

Exercise promotes changes in the hippocampus region of the brain which is the area involved in learning and memory. Aerobic exercise in particular increases oxygen flow to the brain which encourages the growth of new brain cells. So it’s not surprising it helps if you can get an exercise dose in at the start or middle of the day.

Brendon Stubbs talks about this in his research and I wrote about this in my blog post on exercise and mental health recently if anyone wants to read more about this. 

3. Moving your body helps if you are stuck in your mind

If you are stuck at work with a task or something complicated that you can’t get your head around then getting out for some exercise or a walk can be a game changer.  It can even help with decision making.

When you exercise it enables your brain to work more efficiently, allows for greater focus and enhanced concentration. It also importantly gives you a break and allows you to think from a new perspective.

4. Reduces sick days and absenteeism

Exercise has been shown in many scientific studies to reduce the number of sick days employees take. It also reduces presenteeism by encouraging people to be more focused and present. Thus saving businesses and people time. Also importantly it can help prevent you from feeling ill and rubbish as exercise is proven to help the immune system by reducing inflammation.

5. It frees you  up for the rest of your day!

By exercising in the middle of the day you get more time back in your evenings. Instead of rushing home to get to the gym. As Fran said: “Running at lunch instead of after work, for me, means one less thing to do in the evening when I’m trying to pack in, commuting home, cooking, and anything else I want to do. It gives me back more time and makes evenings less stressful and more relaxing”.   

Now so many of us are working from home there’s no better time than ever to fit exercise in to your day. So give it a try so you can gain from more energy, creativity and productivity and all the other amazing benefits moving your body has to offer! 

Have you ever wondered how bringing more gratitude to your life could benefit you? 

There’s a lot of talk at the moment about the benefits of practising gratitude, to increase wellbeing, happiness and build resilience and connection. I’ve decided to explore how it be beneficial in your quest to feel your best self.  

Gratitude journal

I started a daily gratitude journal about 1 year ago after, reading about the practice, and I have managed to stick to it. I downloaded an App on my phone called “Presently”. Every day I think of three things I am grateful for and I write them down in my diary and the App reminds me. These can be anything from feeling grateful for the sensation of the sunshine on my face to feeling grateful for the lovely cup of coffee I just had. It can also be bigger things such as feeling grateful for the supportive people in my life. Here’s an example: 

Today I am grateful for: 

• Lovely people to spend a Saturday in the park with playing games and eating ice cream 
• The gorgeous big blue skies and the fluffy white clouds
• Swimming in the reservoir and the feeling of weightlessness in the water

It takes less than 5 minutes a day to do this and it’s well worth it for the benefits you gain.

How gratitude makes you happy

The science behind this practice shows that if you consistently practice gratitude you will start to notice more good in your life. Our brains also start to notice things we may not have otherwise paid attention to.

It can be really transformative in encouraging positive thinking and a more optimistic outlook in general. You will naturally start to embrace the fullness of life and be more satisfied, happier and less depressed and anxious. You’ll also start to build resilience and be more hopeful in your outlook to life.

Research shows that people who practice gratefulness are able to show more compassion and kindness to others, feel more positive emotions and enjoy better sleep. There’s even some evidence to show that regular practice helps strengthen the immune system. 

One of the founders of the positive psychology movement, Martin Seligman, conducted research into what he calls “the three blessings” exercise. This involves writing down three things that went well during your day, before you go to sleep each night, and then reflecting on these events. Seligman has concluded that people who make this a regular daily practice are “less depressed, happier and addicted to this exercise”. 

How gratitude helps mental health 

Research studies have also been conducted showing that gratitude practice can significantly improve mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety. 

It has also been proven as an effective tool for post-traumatic stress disorder or coping with traumatic events. Gratitude can also build resilience against stress.

It’s important to note that practising gratitude may not always have immediate affects. It can take time for the positive outcomes to show so it’s important to persist for at a least a couple of weeks to start to experience the benefits.

How gratitude rewires your brain 

Studies have been done using brain scanners on people who have practiced gratitude in a controlled setting. The results showed that people who demonstrated gratefulness were: more generous, felt less guilt and had more activity in the area of the brain associated with learning and decision making. Scientists believe that practising gratitude can have long lasting effects on the brain and improve mental health.

Over time, gratitude can build neural sensitivity to more positive thinking. Or more simply, the more you practice gratitude the more your default thinking mode becomes aligned with positivity rather than negativity.

5 ways to practice gratefulness: 

1. Start a gratitude journal:

It’s good to vary your entries so you are reflecting on different things you are grateful for. So whilst I am sure you are always grateful for your family, and/or friends, try to get into more specific details so you are allowing your brain to adapt to new experiences.

So for example, “I’m grateful for my sister and for her making me this delicious meal”. Or “I’m grateful for my husband for bringing me a cup of tea in bed”. This way you will start to notice the small things people are doing for you and you will start to develop a deep appreciation. 

2. Gratitude meditation:

There are lots of great guided meditations you can follow to begin to practice gratitude for yourself. Here are some to try:

·        The Greater Good Science Centre: 10 minute meditation

·        From positivepsychology.com

·        From Jess Heslop on Spotify

·        Headspace

As with all guided meditations, finding a voice which works for you is very much based on personal preference so try a few until you find one which works for you!

3. Play the gratitude game: 

Dr Rangan Chatterjee talks about this in his books the Four Pillar Plan and Feel Better in Five he frequently talks about how he has built gratitude into his family life. Every evening as they are sitting down to eat, his family play a gratitude game. They each take it in turns to answer five questions about their day:

• What have you done today to make someone else happy?
• What has someone else done today to make you happy?
• What have you learned today?
• What have you done today to make yourself happy?
  How did you feel when you made someone else happy?

This serves to connect the family, helps them to discover new things about each other and helps encourage an optimistic and positive mindset. He says “more often than not, we leave the dinner table glowing”.  

You don’t have to do this with family, you could write it down in your journal or get together with a friend and do it.  

4. Start a gratitude jar:

Keep an empty jar in your house and every time you are notice you are thankful for something in your life write it down on a slip of paper. Soon the jar will start to fill up. Any time you feel down or need a pick up go to your jar and read some of your reflections. This will hopefully give you a boost and remind you of some of the positive things in your life.

5. Write a gratitude letter:   

If you can visit the person after writing and sending the letter (if you choose to actually send it) then even better!

There are some more detailed instructions you can follow here on the Greater Good in Action website.

So what do you have to lose?

Give it a go and in just 5 minutes a day you could feel happier, healthier and a more positive you!

I’ve recently read BJ Fogg’s seminal book Tiny Habits and completed his free 5 day habit change course and the groundbreaking book by James Clear Atomic Habits. Both are behavioural change experts covering how change can be made in small incremental steps. Small habits can lead to big changes.

Change isn’t all about motivation and willpower

These ideas offer alternative perspectives to habit change through motivation and willpower. The idea being that motivation only remains high when we want to do something and it appeals. Therefore motivation and willpower alone won’t be enough if you want to develop a new habit for the long term.

Fogg’s and Clear’s philosophies centre around the idea that in order for habit change to become second nature, and succeed in the long term, it needs to be easy and achievable. It may not seem like it at first but building in new small habits can make a big difference. 

“Too often, we convince ourselves that massive success requires massive action. Whether it’s losing weight, building a business, writing a book… we put pressure on ourselves to make some earth-shattering improvement that everyone will talk about. Meanwhile, improving by 1 per cent isn’t particularly notable – sometimes it isn’t even noticeable – but it can be far more meaningful in the long run. The difference a tiny improvement can make over time is astounding”.  

James Clear, Atomic Habits

The philosophies are really interesting and I think we can all learn a lot from these ideas so I’m sharing some of the most interesting findings here as I think they can relate well to fitness, exercise, eating habits and weight loss.

Why is habit change so hard? 

This is a complex question and one which I am sure many of us wish we knew the answer to. Why is it so easy to eat a diet of junk food and why is it so hard to stick to an exercise regime? There are a multitude of reasons: 

• Our brains are programmed to follow the same processes and routines we’ve always followed. Our familiar routines and habits create well trodden neural pathways in the brain so it’s hard to develop new pathways. Change is perceived by the brain as a form of threat. 
• We are therefore inclined to err on the side of caution and follow the most familiar path as this is the safest option. 
• We need to be in the right place for change to be enacted. As Daniel Pink says, we need to be intrinsically motivated to change – i.e. to enact change for ourselves rather than anyone else or an external reason. 
• We might not be ready to enact change. For example, we might be thinking about change but not ready to actually make the step (see the Transtheoretical Model of Change model). 
• Change can feel overwhelming and we can easily get caught up in “all or nothing” type of thinking. For example, the overly ambitious January diet and exercise regime which just doesn’t last. 
• We often have conflicting priorities meaning enacting change is harder. For example, busy parents may struggle to stick to a diet when they are tired, run down and worn out and their child is demanding attention.
• We don’t always appreciate that change isn’t always linear. Often we see progress and then regress. This is especially true for weight loss. Failure and adapting to change is a big part of successful behaviour change. See Elizabeth Day’s How to Fail for more on this. 
• We might underestimate external factors or how our environment affects behaviour change
• We are convinced that behaviour change is all about willpower. It has to be more than this as willpower will not last. As behaviour change expert Michelle Segar says “using self-control or willpower in one situation can deplete it in another”. 

Clear’s explanation of how we approach behaviour change

Clear says that we are trying to change habits in the wrong way. He argues that rather than trying to achieve the “what” we should reframe our objectives to achieve “who” we want to become, so habit change becomes more about identity than achieving a specific goal. We want to deeply engrain a behaviour and idea as part of our identity so we become intrinsically motivated to enact that behaviour. A lot of this can be do with our internal dialogue. 

For example, instead of setting a goal to run a 5K your goal is to become a runner. Of course you can move towards running 5K as part of this but the more you repeat to yourself your assertion that you want to be a runner the more it will become ingrained in your identity. So “the process of building habits is actually the process of becoming yourself”.  Clear says “the ultimate form of intrinsic motivation is when a habit becomes part of your identity”. You will then be more motivated to continue the habits connected with it. So a key question to ask is “am i becoming the type of person i want to become?”                                                                                                                                                    

How do habits work?

Clear talks about Charles Duhigg’s four step model for habits: cue, craving, response and reward. In the simplest terms: 

• Cue: is a trigger which causes your brain to want to initiate a behaviour 
• Craving: is what motivates us to enact a habit – “every craving is linked to a desire to change your internal state”
• Response: is the action performed to enact the habit which an individual must be able to perform
• Reward: the result from any habit

Clear says: 

“The cue triggers a craving, which motivates a response, which provides a reward, which satisfies the craving and ultimately, becomes associated with the cue”. 

James Clear, Atomic Habits

This creates a feedback loop which allows the creation of habits. For example, you see a chocolate bar on your coffee table (that’s the cue): you want to satisfy your urge to eat it and taste the chocolate (that’s the craving); you reach for the bar and eat it (that’s the response); you have then have satisfied the urge to eat the chocolate and this action then becomes connected to you seeing a chocolate bar on your coffee table (the reward). 

The four laws of behaviour change

The rest of Atomic Habits outlines Clear’s framework and four simple rules for creating and sustaining good habits: 

1. Make it obvious (cue)
2. Make it attractive (craving)
3. Make it easy (response)
4. Make it satisfying (reward) 

And for breaking bad habits: 

1. Make it invisible (cue)
2. Make it unattractive (craving)
3. Make it difficult (response)
4. Make it unsatisfying (reward) 

So for the example above, if you are trying to lose weight, you want to make the chocolate bar invisible by placing it away from your line of vision. Make it seem unattractive: buy an alternative such as a low fat cereal bar that you won’t find as appealing. Make it difficult: place it away from temptation – in a cupboard high up in your kitchen inside a biscuit tin which is difficult to open. If it’s difficult enough to eat it will remove the reward aspect and become unsatisfying.

Top 8 tips on how to enact behaviour change through small habits:  

So here are some key takeaways from these two books which resonated with me and which I think everyone can try to implement in their lives. I’ve related my examples to exercise and diet for the purposes of this blog post, but these habits can be related to anything: 

1. Start small. BJ Fogg talks about tiny habits being something you do at least once a day, taking less than 30 seconds and requiring little effort. He says the reason we want to start small is because difficult behaviours need a high level of motivation and this does not work. When a behavior is really small it doesn’t require huge amounts of motivation so is therefore easy to complete. He compares them to plants: 

• You start off with a tiny seed 
• Find a good spot to nourish and grow the seed 
• The seed becomes fully rooted, established and starts to grow 

Follow this recipe and your new habit will start to thrive.  

James Clear talks about the two minute rule. I.e. new habits should not take longer than 2 mins to complete. He calls this a “gateway habit” which can lead to longer more sustained behaviour change as you add to the habit as it becomes established. 

Say you want to start a yoga practice: starting with 2 minutes a day is going to be a lot more achievable, enjoyable and realistic than starting out with 30 minutes a day. If you did this persistently and it worked for you then there’s a good chance that in 6 months you would be doing 20 minutes a day.  

2. Focus on who you wish to become. Try to reframe goals into something which shapes your identity. I want to be a person who enjoys being active and thrives on fitness for example. Visualise this new identity so you can imagine yourself as you wish to be in the future. 

3. BJ Fogg talks specifically about associating new habits with existing habits – he calls this an “action prompt” and Clear calls this “habit stacking”.

For example, everyone brushes their teeth twice a day. If you can attach a new habit to an existing fixed habit you are well on your way to changing your behaviour. This should follow the formula of After I… I will…

So for example, after I brush my teeth, I will do 5 squats. 

BJ Fogg talks about how every time he went to the toilet (in his own home!) he would do 2 press ups. This was 10 years ago and he now does at least 50 press ups a day. I’ve taken on board this idea and I now do 2 tricep dips, on the side of the bath, after I’ve been to the toilet (again at home – doing exercises in public bathrooms especially in the Covid era is probably not recommended!). 

This is a brilliant way to easily fit exercise into your day without really even thinking about it. I must be easily doing, at least, 20 tricep dips a day now and I can feel the benefits in my arms. Some days I do 5 or even 10 in one go. What can you do to attach a new habit to an existing one? 

4. Make it easy and convenient: BJ Fogg and James Clear emphasise how important it is to ensure your new habits are easy to do. As part of the four laws of behaviour change ask yourself: 1. How can I make it obvious? 2. How can I make it attractive? 3. How can I make it easy? 4. How can I make it satisfying? 

For example, if you want to go running 3 mornings a week: leave your running kit out near your bed so you see it as soon as you wake up on those mornings and it’s easy to put it straight on. Decide on a route you enjoy in a place which makes you happy to make it attractive. You could make it easy by going somewhere really near your house. Make it satisfying by meeting a friend so you can run together or promise yourself your favourite coffee when you have finished.  

If you are going to anchor a new habit to an existing habit make sure it fits with what you are trying to do. I.e. if you are going to do press ups every time you boil your kettle make sure you have enough space in your kitchen and your kitchen floor space is suitable. 

5. Congratulate yourself for completing your habit. Part of BJ Fogg’s philosophy is to assign a positive emotion to a new habit. So that we become programmed to recognise that that action felt good and therefore want to do it again. This then helps the brain to rewire. He says that in order for the brain to rewire successfully we must acknowledge the feel good emotion whilst doing the behaviour or immediately after. 

In order to elicit a positive emotion associated with a new habit it’s important to celebrate the action so say to yourself “well done me” or “good for me” once you’ve completed your new habit. 

6. Focus on your overall system rather than a specific goal. Clear talks about how little habits are all part of an overall system and “atomic habits are the building blocks of remarkable results”.  He means looking at the overall process behind an overall goal. He emphasises the importance of implementing a system of “continuous improvements” to achieve a particular outcome. By continually tweaking and making small changes to the processes behind your habits you will be on your way to behaviour change for life. 

7. Make a concrete plan for your new habit. James Clear says “people who make a specific plan for when and where they will perform a new habit are more likely to follow through”. He advises you fill out this sentence: 

I will [BEHAVIOUR] at [TIME] in [LOCATION]. So for example: I will go swimming, at 7pm at my local pool

8. Make your environment work for you. James Clear advises that we should start to think about the environments around us in a different way. If our environment is primed for use it will be easier to enact the habits we want to ingrain. For example, if you want to cook a healthy breakfast then leave out the ingredients and utensils needed the night before so you are primed to see them as soon as you enter the kitchen. If you don’t want to eat chocolate, biscuits or crisps then don’t buy them or if that’s not an option leave them in a place which is difficult to access. 

How can you implement small habits to change your life?

Think about all of the ingrained habits you have in the day: getting up, getting out of bed, brushing your teeth, having a shower, going to the loo, putting the kettle on etc. How many opportunities are there to attach new habits to these existing ones? 

How many times have you said to yourself you will start eating more healthy, exercising consistently, meditating, doing breathing exercises? Can you implement any of the techniques above to bring these new habits into your life?